Monday, August 18, 2008

Breaking News

I'm about to do something in my life that will make most people fall over and probably have a seizure. I have this thing about me that makes me not want to tell anyone that I'm going to do it. Because even though they probably wont say it, I'll be thinking that they are thinking "we told you so". So, I'm avoiding it. They don't even know I'm considering it. Well, now they do. Kinda.

But, it's just that yesterday I had a very weird day. I woke up late, lazed around and popped in a movie. Man, that was one depressing movie. I turned it off and just had this strange, uncomfortable feeling. I had been really thinking some things over during the past 24 hours and I couldn't shake any of it. So, I tried to take a nap, hoping I could get the thoughts or the creepy vibe to go away. Two minutes in, the phone rings. Dang it! I'm working on ignoring some stuff here, people.

So, I get up. I think some more. I go outside to smoke a cigarette....

---pause here for ranting and raving----

and another overwhelming thought pops in to my head. Clear as a bell "blank is not going to happen, if you don't do blank." Oh, and I also had this one: "I need to set a goal." You know, it's a miracle the world hasn't spun of it's axis in the last 24 hours with all that is going on with me right now.

Well, you could say I'm getting ready to make a huge jump. And the only thing that is keeping from turning right around and acting like I didn't hear a thing? My new mantra: "You don't have to be perfect."

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