Pathos

So, these lily pads. You know the ones that I named all of this after? The ones that sit at the top of the page? Well, I have been trying to figure out what next step to make in my life for well, years. But, since I put that picture up on my desk about a month ago, my mind has been racing. So many things I want to do, but can I do them? Why not, other people do them? I'm good at these things, why shouldn't I?

Questions, questions.

I bought new paint supplies this weekend. I have been aching to paint for a while now but have been holding back. I feel too self-conscious, too inadequate, too amateur. Finally I said to myself "Self, you like it. It helps. DO IT!"

So, I have some plans. I'm not ready to talk about them yet but I am so excited I think I may just bust out of my seams. People are going to think I'm crazy but, they are also going to think that I should have done this a long time ago.

I'm ready to jump to the next pad. It's a big one.