The Last Adventure

Went to Richmond over the weekend. I have been wanting to see Jason Mraz in concert for years now, and when I saw he was coming through the area, I snatched up tickets to the Richmond show before seeing that he was playing in Winston a few days before that. Oh well, I love me some road trips and enjoyed my last brief visit to Richmond. Thought I would make a weekend out of it. Got a killer deal on a hotel from priceline and headed out Friday afernoon.

Well, my hotel was only a mile from the venue, and it was still light out when I left, so I walked. During said walk, I realized I would not be doing the return trip for two reasons. 1) It wore me the heck out and 2) um, YIKES. Not a neighborhood for a prego white girl in the middle of the night. Anyway, I had my ticket waiting at Will Call and squeezed through the line that was wrapped around the block. I managed to talk one of the security guys to go ahead and let me in, whew. I don't think I would have survived the night if I had to wait in that line.

Got inside and because of my early arrival and sneaky line tactics, managed to get a great spot, right in front of the sound equipment so I could lean on the railing. The Makepeace Brothers opened the show, followed by the kooky but oh so lovely Bushwalla. In between the host of the show, Justin Kredible, would do some magic tricks. Unfortunately his part started to drag on after a while and after 90 minutes of waiting, a few people started to heckle, saying "Where's Jason?!?!". I felt bad for him, but I agreed with them.

Well, I have to say, I love me some Jason. Thankfully I had downloaded We Sing. We Dance. earlier in the day and had a chance to listen to it on the drive up. I don't like not being able to sing along. I was in a bit of pain, standing there for so long, but once he started playing, and the dancing began, I was able to block it out a bit. Here is one of my fave all time songs, straight from the concert. Sorry in advance for the quality, I'm a photographer, not a videographer. ;)



(This is a very long and rambling post, I apologize if you're bored. My brain isn't working at full capacity these days.)

So, after a great show, I managed to get a cab to take me the few blocks to the hotel. Well worth it as my cab driver graciously told me about a shooting on that street the night before, and pointed out the hookers on the sidewalk. Heh. Well, it was 12:30 am and I hadn't eaten since 3:30pm. Starving. I ordered a pizza and ate it with my eyes half closed. Collapsed in bed and pretended to sleep until 7:30am.

Mom and Dad had told me about The Village Cafe, that they heard about on "Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives". It just so happened to be half a mile from my hotel, so I figured, "I'm indestructible, I'll walk!!" Thankfully, it was mild morning and the neighborhood wasn't so bad going in the other direction. In fact, I walked right through VCU and some gorgeous neighborhoods (at a few points).

Food pictures? Shocking!!!!




After breakfast, I walked around, taking more pictures (that you'll just have to go to flickr to see, cuz this is getting L O N G). Got back to the hotel, took a nap, and checked out. I couldn't decide if I could drag my sorry tush around any more or should just head home. I had planned on going to a few old cemeteries but knew I'd never make it. I hopped in the car and figured I'd drive towards I95. But, I saw some signs for The Canal Walk and headed down to Cary Street, aka The River District. Had lunch at Cha Cha's Cantina and ended up having to leave as soon as a couple doused in cologne sat down. Got some cool pics, picked up a Frog for Mr. Boy and waddled back to the car.

I am STILL tired. No more adventures for a couple of months.

Frustration Of The Day

95% of the pictures I take are portrait, as opposed to landscape framing.

Note to self: Take some both ways each time.

SPRING!

Ok, I know it's been here for almost a month now, but I wanted to make sure it was serious about moving in before I got all excited about it. Spring is my xanax. Helps me recover from those sucky months of cold. I can't imagine what consistency my brain would have been this year with the addition of snow to my mental health.

Anyway, it is supposed to be 77 degrees here in good old NC today. The flowers are blooming, the birds are chirping, the sun is shining and I am wearing my trusty flip flops. All is right with the world. Since I can't take a picture of most of those things (pictures of my feet, um no) I will share some of the flowers with you.

Mom and I are doing some serious garden touring on Saturday, so prepare yourselves. For now, this is just what I've stumbled upon so far.

Caution: Unknown Activities Enclosed

I'm making a quilt. I know, the last thing many ever expected of me. But, I gave the twiners my baby blankets, and I wanted something to give Mr. Boy. So, with a little extra patience (which has been tough) and a lot of help from Momz, it's going pretty well so far.

This weekend I got 95% of the top put together. Throughout bobbin wars, my fingers jumping inside the chopping angle of the scissors and some serious recuperation naps, it looks pretty good. If I do say so myself. Dad even helped. Dad. Even. Helped.
My fabric choices. It was originally the blue, green and softer black and white (second from top in that stack). But, in order to keep the b&w from repeating all the way down the quilt, I added the yellow. Also, I didn't have enough for the softer b&w and added the psychedelic wavy one.

Um, there is a lot of cutting in quilting. I knew this going in to the project, but did not adequately prepare myself for the up and down nature of it all. I guess I could have streamlined my steps, but since this is my first go round at this, I wanted to make sure I was doing it all correctly.

This is The Tomato. Some would just call it a pin cushion, but it's been hanging out in Momz sewing stuff for as long as I can remember. I cannot stand EATING tomatoes in real life, but I adore this little guy.

That little thing in the back. The metal spool? That is a bobbin. We don't get along. Never have, probably never will. A lot of mediation from Momz.
So, this is a good idea of what we've got going on so far. I still need to sew on the border and the binding (say that five times fast and figure out which fabric you're using for it, ha!). Then comes the back of the quilt and let me just tell you, if heaven was a fabric, this stuff would be it. But, I'm gonna wait until we are all done to show you that. Then the hand quilting...the actual QUILTING part. I'll be sure to show you the finished product.

Chicken Big

I eat a lot of chicken. I buy it pretty much in bulk, buy one bag and get one free. I accidentally bought a couple of bags a couple of months ago that weren't de-boned and well, the freezer was over taken with chicken breasts. I couldn't bring myself to use them (I don't do bones), so I finally took them to my parents.

Anyway, so tonight I decided to not only make one of my favorite meals, but satisfy a naughty craving. I'm not supposed to have brie, but I figured if I cook it, then it is ok. So, Brie and Pesto Chicken Breast, Four Cheese Risotto and Sauteed Spinach. It's kind of a tedious meal to put together, as each one has very particular timing, but once it's finished, it is worth it.

Real. Live. Alligators.

So, I went to Florida over the weekend. You may recall, precious millions of readers, that I mentioned a while back that Florida is one a few states I had yet to visit. Well, we can cross her off the list now!!!

I spent 2 days in Tallahasse, the state capital, and a better representation of what Fla (that's what we're calling her here) really is. As opposed to Amusement Parkville and Pretty People Town, further south.

So anyway, it was a quiet weekend. I didn't really accomplish what I had intended, but I did get to see Real. Live. Alligators. It is necessary to punctuate it like that, or you don't give the alligators the respect they deserve, as our warning sign read.

As usual, I had to take pictures of my food. Got laughed at, as usual. (French Dip, by the way.)


We went to Wakulla Springs and ate in the restaurant at the Lodge. Was a gorgeous place. Built in the 1930's and still has the ambiance of the times. The ceiling was painted with scenes from around the property along with some of the animals that lived in the springs and swamp. Afterwards, we took a boat tour of the springs and got to see.......wait for it.....a REAL. LIVE. ALLIGATOR.! Actually, several of them, but you get the point.


Oh, and I got to see my first manatee. Yup, I'm 12 in a 31 year old's body!


So, that was my quick trip to Fla. Hopefully I will make it back one of these days and visit The Keys, Number 3 on my dream trips list.

I love this.

I know I shouldn't, but I do.

From Passive Aggressive Notes

I got sick at the mall today thinking of you...

I walked by Hollister while walking through the mall today. That stench they call cologne, pumping through their ventilation system. Pouring out in to the mall for all of us to choke on. YACK. Abercrombie & Fitch, GAP Body, and any other poser store........take it down a notch. Seriously.

My Forte

I don't like V8.

You know those commercials for V8 in which someone gets smacked in the head for not eating their veggies? I could be the smackee pretty regularly. I just don't get enough fruits and veggies. I do my own grocery shopping so it's not like I am being denied them by someone else, I deny them all on my own.

So, the past few days I have been trying to find ways to get more in my diet. It really isn't that hard, it's just finding a way to do it that doesn't feel like I'm forcing them on myself. Yeah, like I'm a 2 year old and my mom is using that Jessica Seinfeld book.

Anyway, I decided to make chicken salad. Not typically the first thing you think of when someone mentions fruits and vegetables, but it's got a couple things in there, depending on your recipe. I put celery and grapes in mine. Better than nothing, right?

Center Stage

Embarassing Confession of the Month:

I'm watching one of my favorite movies, Center Stage. It is one of the cheesiest, poorly acted, over the top, teen chick flicks ever made, but if I'm ever flipping channels, and it's on, I will watch it. L A M E

But I had lunch at P.F. Changs today. The fam was in town and Mom is addicted to anything Asian/Oriental, so when I balked at choosing, she was all for it. Only my third time there, and Dad had never been, and we all loved it.

I've been craving chili but kept making other meals for my 'week o' leftover' selection. While grocery shopping today, I finally picked up the ingredients. The people I work for put corn in theirs, so I decided to try that. Love it.

Ok, the finale is on....workshop and Cooper's dance and all. Motorcycle's and red tutus. Gotta go!

Get Away

I woke up Saturday morning and had my third panic attack in as many months. After trying to calm down, I knew the only way I could work through the issue was to get out of my four walls. So, I hopped in the car and drove to the beach. Thankfully, it's only a two hour drive. I've always been a water person, a bit happier when there is a body of it around.

An hour of walking along the cold and windy coast began a weekend that I needed more than I could have imagined. Stepping away from my life for a few hours and taking a chance to breath in the salty air, pick up smooth stones and feel the water splash over my toes. My only wish is that I had thought of it earlier, so I could have spent a little bit more time watching the waves cleanse my mind.



I was exhausted from the stress and emotions, and as the sun was setting, I knew I needed to just stay in town and spend the night. I drove in to Jacksonville and got a hotel room. An extravagance that is out of the norm, but a spontaneous 24 hour therapy session I couldn't have predicted would work so well.

I checked in, set down my things. Took an hour to chill and then went to grab dinner. Jacksonville isn't a special town, below average one could argue. But, even in the most boring towns, there is food you can't get anywhere else. Food that sticks to your taste buds and refuses to allow any imposters. I couldn't have been more excited to drive up to the window at Japan Express and ordered the Hibachi Chicken. Just typing the words made my mouth water. One food craving down, two to go.



I didn't get the shrimp sauce in the picture, and actually, I'm denying all of you the best part by doing so, but I hope you begin to get a sense of the deliciousness.

I watched Bernard and Doris and enjoyed the six pillows they lavished on the king size bed. I couldn't believe there was such a nice hotel room in Jacksonville. The town is full of cheap motels for the Marines to escape to on the weekends. Hence, they are a little 'used'. But the Fairfield is pretty new and probably a little out of the Marines' price range, so I lucked out. Even after the taxing day, I could not go to sleep. Not until 3 am. Yeah.

I got up and took advantage of the hotel breakfast in the lobby. Watched some lame show on VH1 and hung out until it was time for craving fulfillment number two. I met Julee at Duck's, an old standby and immediately ordered the chicken quesadilla. Can I just tell you it was better than I remembered. And that's not just from the two years since the last taste test. They really have improved it. Man, oh man. Yummmmy. Julee would have mocked me incessantly so I spared you all from a picture. But, I have some leftovers, so maybe another day ;).

As for craving number three. I couldn't do it. I was stuffed and tired. I needed to get home, couldn't go waiting around The Armpit for another meal. Tony's and the calzone will have to wait for another time. And don't I know it will be worth it.

24 hour therapy session was one of the best things I could have done for myself. It certainly doesn't erase the stress that caused the panic attack, but it gave me a breather to build up some strength for the next run of it all.

Where I've Been

I left Portland as soon as my Doctor would let me, maybe a day early. My Mom and I packed in the little GLC and drove South, through California. Visited my Gran, saw things I hadn't seen since I was in single digits. Got back to NC after a road trip filled with trunks flying open and cassettes of Michael Jackson telling me about the Man In The Mirror. It was a long drive, for millions of reasons.

I spent a few weeks mourning in my parents home. I really don't remember a lot of that time, anger, sadness, confusion, and a couple dashes of depression. But that's always been there, so it brushed it under. Threw away the prescription for prozac and pushed on. I got an apartment with my brother and went back to work. Temping at the Medical School in town and continued doing the church thing they made me go back to in Portland.

After a year, I had become bored. My parents had moved to Tennessee and my brother had gone of to Idaho. I sold everything. The GLC, everything and moved to Salt Lake City. I was so ready to move on that I didn't have a job, I had only talked to my new roommate on the phone and didn't have a car. I was going to bus it and announce I was going to have Thanksgiving dinner with my imaginary fiance's family within 10 months. If I had a nickel for every time I have been oblivious in my life.

I continued with Church Life there for a few months and grew to hate that city so much, it's lack of diversity and Satan's spawn falling from the sky and never melting, I went back to Marlboro Town. Oh, my roommates LOVED that. I lasted in that hell hole for only a year.

Wells was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis and I offered to move to New Jersey to help The Clarks. So, I had to quit smoking, again. For someone else. If I had a nickel for every time I've changed my life for someone else. But I cannot tell you how much I loved it there. NJ has secrets. It is beautiful where it wants to be, and where it doesn't, it leads you to the Emerald City. I found parts of myself in NYC. Broadway shows, Central Park, Chrysler Building. It brought me to tears.

I worked EVERY day. Very rarely were there weeks that I had a full day off, but I wouldn't have changed a thing. I got to see Cape Cod. I traveled to the Coast of NC. I saw Vermont. Not a thing. I fell in love with some amazing people. I think those little ones healed my heart. Filled holes left by those two I couldn't hold on to. Allowed me to see life as it should be, the life I knew I was unable to reach.

Sadly, they got older, started going to school and not needing me. So I packed up the car and saw him chase me down the street. Never in my life, he begged me to stay and I wish I could have. He was an angel who brought light I had never known. Sparta had turned in to a snow globe where I felt safe, but I was being pulled away, being anchored in safety does not allow growth.

I didn't know what I was getting in to when I landed in Jacksonville. No, not Florida, I wasn't that lucky. Jacksonville, NC - the armpit of the Crystal Coast. I lived in a condo by myself for the first year. I worked so much I hardly even noticed. But once I started to realize the devil I was working for, I started to need some outside clarity. I found a roommate in the newspaper and moved in to what felt like The Foursome all over again. It took a little while to hit our stride, but we had so much fun. I found the best friend I had ever known. I did things I knew I shouldn't, people whose names I couldn't remember, drinks that were taller than me, and smoked like a friggin freight train. It was like I was 21 all over again.

But then, oh then, it all fell apart. The Goat was gone, I was losing my brother to bottles of whiskey, the Black Hole was eating me alive. I ran as fast as I could and hid, again, at my parents. Guess who was back, our lovely friend depression. For almost a year, I lived on the pull out bed in my parents house. If I had a nickel for every time I shouldn't have lived with my parents. Our relationship is so much better when we are apart.

So, I moved, again. Should we count how many times I have moved? One sec, I'll be back.....ok, I've got 9 times in 13 years. Lovely. I'm in Durham now, in the middle of counting more nickels. In the middle of realizing a lot of things about my life. Forks in the road that damaged me more than I could have known. Our friend has planted himself deep inside of me. I'm afraid to get rid of him, he is all I've ever known. Who will I be without him? I hope he leaves as soon as possible.

I have missed having touchstones in my life. I would love to find them, but they seem uncomfortable. At least I know The Goat will always be there.